Love And Respect by Emerson Eggerichs Part Ten

Installment #10 Love and Respect.

Eggerichs begins to talk to men specifically. He gives some decent advice like looking past criticism to a wife's heart and what she is really trying to say and what she really means. However, although Eggerichs recommends against stonewalling and the like, he also says husbands simply "responded like a male." (pg 182 LP) When it comes to describing what women do however, he says things like "When his wife comes at him with disrespect flashing in her eyes and venom shooting from her tongue, every husband has two choices." (pg 183) We don't have clear definition as to what a woman is doing or saying, or why she is saying it when he uses these types of words, but it seems that whenever a woman "disrespects" her husband and criticizes something he is or isn't doing, this applies. He uses the words "verbal deathblows" repeatedly. (pg 185)

Eggerichs calls his own message "new and even revolutionary." (pg 184) He says that "You cannot go wrong trusting and obeying God's revelation." (pg 199)

Eggerichs claims that marital conflict is hard for a man and easy breezy for a woman. "A husband can feel as if he is drowning. A wife...stays afloat quite naturally and comfortably." (pg 200)

Eggerichs claims "While his heart rate may be going through the roof, hers is slow and steady." (pg 108) I would really like to see a study on this one as this goes against everything I can even imagine.

"As usual she became disgruntled and vexed with him about something trivial." (pg 200) "She stopped her ranting..." (pg 201) After a husband invites his wife to pray over this together, she immediately took his hand and calmed down. The description of her voicing her needs is so degrading.

Eggerichs suggests that after they both get done with a day of work that the husband sits and talks with her while she "may be busy with children or other duties." (pg 207) Sheesh, Dr Eggerichs, I'm sure she will appreciate him sitting there while she does the work! But, Eggerichs frames this as the husband doing a good deed for talking with her rather than watching TV.

He gives a blurb about his daughter and says she was "talking as usual-little Miss Motormouth." (pg 209)

And to finalize for this installment, he gives men an out if they really don't feel like doing any of this: "As a man, you will probably not be able to be as involved with your wife as much as she may like. I am not asking men to become women who sit at tiny tables at cappuccino shops and sip coffee as they share life face to face." (pg 211) So, it's ok, dude. This is just you "being a man." (pg 182) Eggerichs excuses men and degrades women.

This writing is the copyright of Lynne Johnson-Yohnk and was posted with her permission. It was originally posted on her Paradigm Shift Page. Additional articles may be viewed here.

Page added December 25, 2025

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